You want me to WHAT?

Matthew 14:22-33

It had been a difficult few days. The devastating news had reached them that Jesus’ cousin John had been murdered – beheaded in a political plot. You might remember what happened…the passage just before today’s passage was our Scripture on November 12th. Jesus had tried to get away. He needed to grieve, to pray, time to just breathe and feel, solitude. But as they had sailed across to an isolated shore, the crowds had walked around the shore and met them as they landed. Jesus’ compassion wouldn’t let him ignore their needs. He set his own aside and healed and taught all day until evening. The disciples had tried to get him to send the crowds away to get food. He needed rest. They needed dinner. But, instead, he had miraculously fed thousands – at least 5,000 men, plus the women and children…must have been more than 20,000 there on the hillside. Once they were fed, body and soul, once their wounds were healed physical and spiritual, Jesus dismissed them. He told the disciples to go on and sail back across the sea. He would meet them later. He went up on the mountainside alone to pray.
Not only was John beheaded in a political plot, the genesis of that plot was not the teaching and baptizing that John was doing in the wilderness…it was the reports of Jesus that had reached Herod. The powers in control were feeling threatened, and maintaining their power was the only thing important to them. The only thing that had slowed Herod was fear of public outcry because they considered John a prophet. But, when the opportunity presented itself – and he could say that he was honoring his promise to grant her whatever she wished and didn’t realize that his niece would ask for John’s head – Herod had the head delivered to her at his birthday party on a silver platter.

The disciples as they left Jesus on the shore that night surely were discussing it. What risks lay ahead? Peter, Andrew, James and John telling again the story of the day Jesus called them away from their fishing business to catch people alive. The powers of oppression were hearing about their truth telling. Pax Romana was kept by forcing people down…they were standing up. It was an uneasy night on the water. And then a little after 3 in the morning, the winds started, and the waves. They were up, the wind was against them, so to reach the other shore, they would have to sail in a zigzag, sideways to the wind direction – it’s called tacking – it can double or triple the time it takes to get across the lake.

Then they saw it. A figure coming toward them across the water – like it was floating on the water – straight toward them – undisturbed by the wind and waves. “It’s a phantasma” – a ghost, a spirit, a phantom, an apparition,…it’s something and it’s not natural, and we are panicking! The translation nicely states: “It’s a ghost,” they said, and cried out in fear.

This was not a staged, “Oh, I’m so scared!” This was things are happening that I can’t explain and you see it too? Panic! They were in full alarm stage of the fight-or-flight response. One time when I was in middle school, we were swimming in the neighbor’s pool, and after I jumped off the diving board, my dad saw a snake near the skimmer in the deep end. He was standing in the shallow end. When I came up, dad calmly called “swim down here” (instead of to the ladder by the snake). You know why? Because I would have had a reaction like the disciples were having to that thing on the water!

Immediately, Jesus sees their reaction and calls out, “Deep breath, it’s me. Don’t be afraid.”

And Peter, brave and strong, calls out, “If it is you, call me to come to you on the water.” He knows that Jesus has power over the forces of nature. He leaves the security of the boat, the company of the others, and steps out onto the water. What faith!

And then he sees the wind and is afraid and begins to sink. You know what happens, “Lord, save me!” And Jesus reaches out and catches him, “Oh, you of little faith, why did you doubt?” And they climb in the boat and the wind dies down, and they worship Jesus saying, “Truly, you are the Son of God.”

Is Jesus reprimanding Peter or is he celebrating that he has a little faith! Just before they got the news about John’s death, Jesus had been teaching them parables…one of them was the parable of the mustard seed. Ever the teacher, Jesus is saying to Peter, this is a growing moment. Think about what made you doubt.

Brian McClaren is a writer and practical theologian, and he argues that doubt is a passageway from one stage of faith to the next, that without doubt our faith doesn’t grow and develop. Paul Tillich, another theologian, argued that doubt is not the opposite of faith but a part of having faith. The word Jesus uses that we translate “doubt” is distazo, literally, “double stance” – “shifting between two positions” – zigzagging – it’s tacking.

I think Jesus is trying to help Peter realize what is making him doubt. It is fear. Fear of the future – threatening those who seek power for domination and control is dangerous. Fear of the unknown – who or what was that coming across the water. Fear of the wind – his focus shifted from Jesus to the storm around him…and he started to sink.

Peter’s great moment achievement is not getting out of the boat. He asks to get out of the boat. “If it’s really you, tell me to come to you on the water.” All Jesus said was in response, “Come.”

The wind that is against Peter’s faith is fear. As Jesus approaches them, he says, “Gather yourselves, it is I. Do not be afraid.” I know the first time I quoted Jesus I translated that first command, “Deep breath.” It’s a hard word to translate. It’s a hard thing to do. I think it may be something that each of us has to figure out for ourselves, that thing that gets us past our fears when we think “You want me to WHAT?”

Take a deep breath; gather yourself. Do not be afraid.

Do not be afraid of the future. Do not be afraid of the unknown. Do not be afraid of the storms of life. As soon as you start tacking, going back and forth, trying to hold a double stance – I trust God, but I’m just worried… you start to sink.

Fear sparks fight or flight, violence or division, oppression or polarization. Fear leads to “othering.”

Dr. Terence Lester is founder and director of a ministry in Atlanta, Love Beyond Walls, that raises awareness of the needs of those living in poverty or homelessness and mobilizes people to respond. One morning, a neighbor of Love Beyond Walls came in to report that there was a man digging through their dumpster. Like Peter and the disciples, she had seen something or someone, and she was afraid. Dr. Lester told her that their ministry was to advocate for those experiencing homelessness, providing for people in need. And she replied that she was contemplating calling the police. It was an uneasy moment. But, Dr. Lester ventured outside and found Mark by the dumpster and asked if he could help. It was January. “I’m cold,” he replied, “I haven’t eaten in days. I was hoping to find something to eat. I have been crying out to God.” Mark was caught from sinking. The woman who came to report Mark wasn’t the only one who could have been Peter. Mark had been contemplating suicide, afraid that there was no hope for him, afraid that he had no future. Fed, given shelter and support, Mark, who had a business degree and had once owned his own home, moved out of homelessness, has reconnected with his children, and now is a regular volunteer at Love Beyond Walls.

“What causes you to doubt?” Jesus asked Peter, asked the neighbor, asked Mark, asks us. Fear. Not knowing. Fear and faith don’t coexist.
Faith leads us to seek awareness and understanding. Fear had the disciples panicking instead of calling out across the water, “Who are you?”

Faith leads us to get out of our boats of security and trust that God is supporting us as we move toward Jesus.

Faith leads us to focus not the storms of life, but on living like Jesus, helping people get back in the boat.